There are many definitions of karmic relationships and essentially they relate to the souls that we meet lifetime after lifetime and choose to have experiences with. These experiences carry karma because the lessons are usually unfinished as well as the interactions between the souls create more karma (cause and effect) to be balanced out and understood in future lives.
It is a beautiful way of learning and developing yet it also carries consequences for our existing paradigm. If we are unconscious to the teachings then it can be very difficult to understand what is happening. So we repeat the lesson. Over and over again.
Additionally the souls we meet who have karmic teachings tend to evoke the deepest emotional wounds from within us – because the wound is far beyond this lifetime. Thus karmic relationships tend to evoke difficult, challenging and often traumatic experiences.
However karmic relationships have also gotten a bad rap. They have been termed as the type of connection that is inferior and we want to move away from – perhaps to someone who is more conscious. This in itself misses the point. It is not about the Other. It is about how we (and they) choose to meet the same experience and choose another way. This is where we transmute a karmic cyclical pattern into one that is conscious and elevatory.
Therefore if we bring consciousness into any relationship – friend, partner, family member – we are offered the opportunity for immense transformation. This is where the true elevation occurs for us (and them). This may not work in all scenarios yet the Universe will present enough opportunities for us to at least begin to try.
What are the examples here?
Karmic cyclical patterns can include any of the following:
- Attracting the same kind of partner, with the same themes – even though they seem different on the outside.
- Having highly emotional, obsessive experiences (when first meeting someone) – feeling a deep soul connection – and then having explosive drama follow!
- Having a continuous series of friends/pratners throughout your life where someone plays the role of either betrayer / rejector / aggressor / persecutor / abandoner
So how do you resolve karmic relationships?
The key is to first do something that we rarely want to do.
Own your reality.
The moment you own your reality you aren’t saying that this Other’s behaviour is OK.
You are saying I am in charge of my reality therefore I can change it.
I can choose to change it in a number of ways.
Sometimes removing that individual is needed (especially if we haven’t been able to do this previously in our life)
However if that is our knee jerk reaction (and we are blaming this individual privately) then we are more than likely to attract the same situation.
Karmic relationships are often emotionally charged as they are designed to evoke deepest emotions calling to be released.
Once released they can liberate you from the pattern. They are always trying to help you!
However without understanding what is happening, it is no wonder most of us recoil and act defensively. Over time we learn about the nature of compassion, letting go, forgiveness where we want to choose another way.
So what ways are there to transmute karmic relationships?
One of the most powerful ways is Communication.
Communication is the antithesis to unconscious behaviour. It means we have to listen to another and they to us. It means we take down our shields and guards and own what we are projecting onto them (hence our reactive dynamic). We move into compassion and try and navigate the unchartered waters of learning a new skill: communicating from the heart.
We have all been trained (and trained ourselves) in communicating from the ego! This is known as the power games, blame, shame, judging, withdrawal, projection.
Yet over time we recognise these ways only create more pain. They are indeed the fuel for negative karmic connections. So Communication offers us a challenging yet infinitely rewarding path out. It is the pathway of vulnerability and not about another agreeing with us. It is about us sharing what we have gone through and being equally open to how we may have mistreated another.
Essentially karmic relationships show us that we all have pain and we manipulate others with that pain (innocently from a soul level) in order to get love, or the love in the way we think we want it.
We may do it in small ways whilst others in bigger ways – yet the key is to try and separate the ego’s desperate need to see us in the perpetual victim state. If we are equal then we understand we have equal power. This is the key to healing.
Yet there is also beauty to karmic relationships….Karmic relationships are in many case with souls who we have deep connections with across lifetimes. Imagine loving someone and knowing them on deep levels to then choose to play a bad actor in their next life. To initiate pain, trauma – so they can learn how to then transmute that pain or to release a karmic pain that has been waiting for a trigger point. That takes love.
There is a saying, sometimes you need soft love and sometimes you need tough love. Both are essential and parents know this well. Often karmic connections work with tough love because it is the clearest way of mirroring back pain for it to be seen. Yet this is usually all done unconsciously.
Karmic relationships are also elevatory throughout our life. In other words you can meet certain souls in different phases of your life who represent different stages of your own development. As you change and evolve, the types of souls you meet change too. Yet the depth of connection and charge can still be there.
So some relationships can be moved on from, others can be transmuted (esp with friends), some with partners can move through the three stages of Life, Death, Rebirth to evolve like the proverbial phoenix. Many can also be temporary in nature.
This is where it becomes interesting. As it is less about Karmic relationships and more about Karmic patterns within – as this is what we truly want to heal. That which is repeating. That which represents the wounds.
The paradox here is that knowing that you do not need karmic patterns (repetitive cycles) to heal core themes – begins a process of moving away from the cause-effect learning process – into a multidimensional way of connecting (conscious relating).
Blessings on your journey
Karmic Relationship Healing
If you want to dive deeper into karmic relationships check out our Karmic Relationships intensive where we go all out to clear ancient vows, contracts, cyclical patterns and stories connected to Karmic Patterns in Relationships: https://vimeo.com/ondemand/relationshipactivations/588082885